I don’t know if anyone ever actually reads my blogs, but I figured I could get a bit more personal on this newest installment. The students all left on Wednesday, so Hepburn has become way too quiet for me liking. This means I will get a ton of work done, but with my brother gone for the weekend it leaves me feeling like I am in the middle of no where all alone. As many of you know, when I have a ton of free time on my hands and time to think my mind starts to spin like one wouldn’t believe. I start to think WAY too much, and can get myself in trouble as I get contemplative and sentimental, etc.
Anyway, I figured that a good way to focus my time would be to do some reading, and reflect on what God has taught me, and also be silent and listen to what He has been trying to say to me all semester!
As I look back on the semester God has been good to me, He keeps reminding me of that. This past semester has been a really interesting one. I have learned a ton, that is for sure, in ways that I was definitely not looking for and did not expect in coming here to the small town of Hepburn to work at Bethany College! I came here thinking in many ways like it was just a simple stepping stone to where God wants me to be in the future, I was looking past this year a lot. I quickly realized that God had other things in mind for me. There are amazing students, faculty and staff here who have built into my life in so many ways. I have really learned how geared I am toward other people. If all I did was my work and then went home and did my own thing, without interacting with the students I would feel so incomplete. But, on the other extreme, this has made me quite unbalanced. I feel like I have been trying to do so many things for other people, working all day and then coaching hockey late in the evening, and trying to hangout a bit with my brother each night before he goes to bed, etc, etc! I want to get re-focused and make some time for myself where I can just sit back and listen for what God is trying to teach me, and to talk to Him. I do not do this close to enough. I have been trying to stay in shape by going to the gym at least three times a week, and this has really fallen by the wayside. And even one of my big focuses has fallen down, visiting with the guys in the dorms! I was in the dorm the other day and a guy made a comment that he was surprised to see me in there! I don’t know how best to find this balance in the busy life at Bethany, but I pray that God will help show me where my focuses need to be and how to combine some of them… anyway, here is what God has spoken to me about lately:
Luke 11:5-13
5-6Then he said, "Imagine what would happen if you went to a friend in the middle of the night and said, 'Friend, lend me three loaves of bread. An old friend traveling through just showed up, and I don't have a thing on hand.'
7"The friend answers from his bed, 'Don't bother me. The door's locked; my children are all down for the night; I can't get up to give you anything.'
8"But let me tell you, even if he won't get up because he's a friend, if you stand your ground, knocking and waking all the neighbors, he'll finally get up and get you whatever you need.
9"Here's what I'm saying:
Ask and you'll get;
Seek and you'll find;
Knock and the door will open.
10-13"Don't bargain with God. Be direct. Ask for what you need. This is not a cat-and-mouse, hide-and-seek game we're in. If your little boy asks for a serving of fish, do you scare him with a live snake on his plate? If your little girl asks for an egg, do you trick her with a spider? As bad as you are, you wouldn't think of such a thing—you're at least decent to your own children. And don't you think the Father who conceived you in love will give the Holy Spirit when you ask him?"
A practical example of this is using basketball… I am not a three point shooter at all, but I told myself that I would keep attempting them today until I made one… usually I can make like one out of five or six, but today I could not hit one if my life depended on it, but I kept pushing at it and finally I made one! That felt so good! I decided to keep shooting until I missed (risky for me, because I am stubborn and like to end on a good note). Well, I made the next four. It just clicked! As soon as I released the ball I knew the ball was in the net. This is a good analogy, because sometimes no matter how hard we try life just doesn’t seem to work the way we want it to, but finally it clicks and just feels right. We need to be persistent in following God’s will for our lives and praying consistently and persistently. He knows what is best for us, and sometimes that is a no, or a wait. These answers are hard, but they make us stronger, and when we finally get a yes it feels so good and right, just like when I finally made a 3-pointer. If I had made the first one then it wouldn’t have felt even close to as good as when I finally made one after so many attempts!
God will grant us our prayers, we must be diligent in our prayers. He has our best in mind though. I am so thankful that some of my prayers were answered with a no, instead of a yes right away. There are others where I still don’t know what the answer is, perhaps it is just, wait. I find that one to be the hardest one of all. I think it is one that I have been learning the last couple of years, but in particular this year. I feel in so many ways like my life is in a hiatus. I am in an interim athletic director role until April and then have no idea where I will be after that. Right now I try not to think about that. God has it in control, but at the same time it is kind of scary. I have moved a lot the last few years, from Eatonia, to Eston, to Regina, to Langley and finally Hepburn. Each place has helped me grow on this journey and I have learned something new and different!
God has His timing, and I know it is right… sometimes it is “wait.” I am not very good at waiting, I want to figure out a solution all of the time.
But, when God finally gives a yes to each of my continuous prayers I know it will be sooo right! He knows what the perfect job is for me, and where I will be of the best service for His kingdom… that could be in Saskatoon, Regina, Alberta, or maybe even a province I have never lived in like Ontario! I want to be open to His guiding! There are always factors that enter in to decisions, but God has continuously put a peace in my heart when he says "Yes" or "Go."
Jadon "The Rambler" Frank
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